Long Distance Relationship- What I've learnt

It's the 1st of August and I'm so happy. 

Firstly because I have just got my first ever proper pay check  (shopping time!!), and secondly, I'm so proud and happy that there is one month less until I see my boyfriend again.

As I mentioned in my previous post, my boyfriend moved to Australia for 5 months to partake in a study abroad. Having experienced long distance with him before, I live in Ireland and he lives in London so every Summer, Christmas etc we are apart, I was semi prepared for what's to come. But this time, when he is halfway across the world and I know, no matter what, I can't see him until December has made things a lot different.

Whether you are about to experience it, currently experiencing it, or have in the past, the hardness of long distance relationships cannot be ignored. I want to share with you my own personal story of my LDR. My experiences, thoughts and advice, and I would love for you to share yours with me too.

I hope this brings you comfort in some way...

If you are and your partner are willing to go through a long distance relationship, it is clear you love each other. So in terms of breaking up, love is never a problem, however, growing apart is.
I can't stress enough how important communication is. It seems like an obvious one, and it is, but the power of it cannot be  underestimated.
In LDR's it's very likely your life is a lot different without your partner, whether it be because you have adjusted to life without them, or new experiences and opportunities have been thrown your way. Therefore, it is so important to ensure you both communicate so you are still part of each other's lives and you don't grow apart. Whether it be messaging or sending photos on Whatsapp, writing letter or emails, or Skyping, it is so important to always make time for one another.

Whether you live together or thousands of miles apart fights  are inevitable. There will be hard days, but it's about working through the fights and not giving up because you know when you see them again in the future it will all be worth it. It's emotionally frustrating you can't be together, you ask 'Why me?', and this frustration can cause a lot of fights. To put it simply, sometimes when we are fighting with our loved one, in a LDR we feel the closest to them because fights show you care about each other. But this isn't a healthy way to deal with things. Although fighting to a degree is normal, petty fights are not. Instead, turn your emotional frustration to a simple message saying 'I miss you' or a quick Skype session just to hear their voice again.

It's also still so very important to celebrate the milestones and be proud of what you are trying! I know a lot of couples who break up when they move to another city 1 hour down the road. I'm not saying the relationship will work out, but I think the fact you are trying a LDR is amazing! The love you both must have for each other really shows so never stop celebrating this.

I'm not sure how many of these posts I will do, let me know if you would like more on my journey. Also I think it is important to note that I am 100% not saying follow these tips to a perfect LDR. Every experience is different, and this is mine. I really want mine to work, but in reality, it may not, so talking to you guys about this is a big deal. Whether my LDR works or not, I am so proud at 20 years old I have met someone who is willing to wait for me and me them.

Let me know if you enjoyed this post or have any thoughts, comment, tweet, DM or share this post.
And to all you who are in a LDR right now, be proud because what you are doing is amazing.

Much love,
Those Young Years x
@thoseyoungyears

Behind the scenes- The ups and downs

It's so obvious and I can't lie to you all that recently the frequency of my blog posts have been poor to say the least. But if I'm honest life just got in the way.

It's incredible how much can change can happen in such a short space of time, it's almost as if as soon as you get comfortable in your situation life decides 'Nope, get up off your ass, appreciate what you have, take challenging opportunities and beat any difficulties I throw at you'. Well at least that's what it feels like for me.
My last blog post was in June, so let me tell you a little about what has happened within the past month behind the scenes of this blog into my life:

Exams

 I hate exam season. Everyone is stressed so tempers are running high and there is nothing more you want than no responsibilities for a day so you can just chill out and watch some Netflix without feeling guilty.
Thankfully, my hard work did pay off and I got my results last week and passed all my exams with a high 2:1, yipeee!

Holiday

I was lucky enough to be able to go to the beautiful Santorini in Greece, with my boyfriend mid-July after my exams. I will do another blog post to follow on this, but it was beautiful, fun and amazing.

Placement

After a gruelling process all year I was fortunate enough to land myself a year placement within one of the largest corporations in the world. This means a year out of uni, working a real job at a real company (which means a real salary, HELLOOO TopShop). So far it has been amazing, but don't get me wrong still getting used to the 6:45am alarm and the commute everyday. I love my bed too much!

Moving house

As I am now working and taking a year out of uni I have also had to say goodbye to my old housemates (I love you guys!), and welcome with open arms my new ones.

Long distance relationship (LDR)

Although all the above are positive experiences in my life, this one is not so much. As I mentioned in my post 'Life's harsh truths; Everyone's battle' which you can click here to view, I have been mentally preparing for a situation I could have never have actually been ready for...Today my boyfriend moved to Australia for 5 months. Obviously I am immensely proud of him and 100% support him in following his dreams, but I cannot deny that this news also saddens me. Long distance relationships are hard and take alot of work. The future is uncertain and, is it bad to say I miss him already after a measly 7 hours? This situation is just hard, but I'm hoping that with a new job, being incredibly busy and having new housemates to hangout with that time will fly.

I am finding the sudden realisation of the fact he is gone hard and I would really appreciate to hear from you guys. Have you ever been in a LD relationship? How did it work out? Do you have any advice?

As I said in my About Me section, I want this to be a friendly, loving community which we can support and help each other on, so let's do exactly that!

As you can see, this month has been full of changes, and although I love writing this blog (and I hope you love reading it), I realised I had to focus on my future in exams and preparing for placement, aswell as making the most of the time I had left with my boyfriend.

So share with me your experiences below by commenting, share with any friends you know possibly dealing with a LD relationship or even direct message me on twitter @thoseyoungyears and I will be chuffed to read and reply to what you have to say. I hope you can understand my absence, but I promise from this day, there will be ALOT more content from me.

Much love,

Those Young Years

x

Life's harsh truths; Everyone's battle

This post may seem unorganised and like a huge jumble of words which are not making a lot of sense, and you are right, it probably doesn't. 

The truth is alot has happened within the past month, I've started exams, preparing for placement and I am dealing with something which I never expected or  could have ever prepared myself for. As much as I would love to tell you and get your lovely help and support, I'm just not ready yet. Although, hopefully with a few more weeks to digest the news, I do plan on sharing it with you, keeping you informed on the journey it will take me, discussing the topic with you and helping each other  who are in similar situations.
This blog was always going to be addressing some of the harsh truths in life, and this particular news has definitely taught me that sometimes it does seem like life can be cruel, throwing obstacles in your imaginary life plan which in your head seemed all so simple and beautiful. However, although it may seem like a painful complication now, I am a firm believer in that everything does happen for a reason. Sometimes it is important to remind ourselves that it may lead to greater happiness and love in the future, or things may not work out how you wanted them to, but if you allow it, it can help build you as a person and enable you to become stronger than you could have ever imagined.

"Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a battle of their own"

I find this quote to be comforting yet sad. Comforting because it's nice knowing you are not alone in over-coming hard situations every day. Sometimes, in our own sorrow, we look to other peoples 'perfect'  lives and wish that ours can only be half as easy as theirs. However, the sad truth is that, everyone IS facing their own battle, whether it be a battle within themselves, friends, family or relationships. It is important to know that nobody has the perfect life, some of us are just better at hiding it than others, so it is important that we execute kindness with everyone. If you know someone facing a hard situation, even if they do not wish to discuss it, a simple 'I'm here for you', can be all they need to hear. If they do want to talk, it's important to listen, be patient and understanding of their thinking or situation.

However, I'm definitely not one for negativity, and although I do love a good cry about sad things sometimes, I try not to let them get me down for too long. Next time your sad, even try and think of one thing your thankful for in your life, or a good thing which could come out of your situation. The latter may seem very difficult in some circumstances, and it is, but sometimes only time can help you realise these things. Has it taught you what you want in life, how you don't want to act towards others or made you appreciate the little things in life like the constant support of family and friends?

Although everyone is facing their own battle, always remember that life is beautiful, and when something kicks you down in life, take time to be sad if you need to, but as soon as you have cried everything out put on a song that makes you feel good then get back up and fight back even harder to make your life the best it can be!

Please let me know if you found this post comforting. Share it with others if you think it will help and don't hesitate to comment or direct message me on twitter @ThoseYoungYears if you have anything you would like to share. I ALWAYS look forward to reading your lovely comments!

Sending alot of love and happiness your way,
Those Young Years

x

Update: Good news everyone! I've joined Facebook! I'd greatly appreciate it if you gave facebook.com/thoseyoungyears  a like! I'll keep you up to date on blogposts, everyday life and anything I find on the big internet which I want to share x